I’ve said it already and I’ll say it again, I fucking love this movie! The only reason it got a 4 overall and not a 5 is because the black pimp is wearing a white suit throughout when it should be purple suede, obviously. Then we would have a perfect Saturday night gore-fest!
This film has just about everything I want in a horror movie; bad acting, bad dubbing, a huge body-count, pimps turned action heroes, crazy amounts of gore, fucked up green goo-dripping monsters, and a silly plot that just keeps turning and twisting. What more could you ask for?
The actual storyline basically centers around a masked ‘phantom of the opera’ reject handing out tickets on the streets for a new cinema opening night with the showing of a rare slasher movie to mark the occasion. Once inside the cinema, however, our cheapo, free-ticket snatching Italian cousins find more than they bargained for when one of their numbers turns into a snarling demon and a bloodbath of epic proportions ensues.
In perfect zombie movie tradition, when one of these grotesque looking bastards gets you, even a little, you eventually turn into one of them and go looking for a little human snack yourself. Cue lots of ‘Are you okay, you look kind of pale? What’s happening to your face? Jesus fucking wept, is that claws coming out of your fingers!? Giant claws and huge curly teeth??!!’ And…<SLASH!>
Why do these people never just run pre-transformation? He had me running at ‘pale’.
Near the end, it all goes a bit Wu-tang when our last two remaining peeps realize that driving around inside a cinema on a motorbike and cutting heads off with a samurai sword won’t actually get you out of a bricked up building, until a helicopter smashes through the (concrete? cardboard?) roof and the rope ladder that just happens to be onboard casually falls out…Now that is fucking lucky. But even then there’s more twists and action to come, but I wont spoil it any more for you…He’s on the roof by the way.
There’s some creepy shit in an air vent (oh fuck, it’s behind me and in front??!! That probably means there’s two of them, you dumb bastard and it looks like your tickets punched, no…wait…there you go), some all-out bloody madness in the upper stalls, and a weird little side story that looks like it’s going nowhere until BLAM! Oh no, it is actually going nowhere.
Get this DVD today, really, I mean it. It’s easy, just get your mum or dad’s credit card, click the Amazon link below and Bob’s your auntie, DVD heaven.
The rest is pretty self-explanatory.
Official review
Several people are invited to join the opening of a new movie theatre. As the horror film shown to the guests gets more and more violent, the large crowd starts to transform one by one into bloodthirsty demons. The remaining guests begin the desperate battle for their lives inside the now-bricked up theatre with no way out and no chance of survival
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This post is tagged cinema, dario argento, demons, giallo, gore, motorbike
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